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Fragility July 16, 2009

Posted by Justin Farr in Uncategorized.
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What is it about relationships that makes them so ephemeral? They are fragile. If you touch them, they might break. Shatter into hundreds of sharp tiny pieces. You can’t put it back together after that. Years down the road, you’ll be walking barefoot and be impaled by a piece you had missed. The blood will seep out as a painful reminder. You had almost forgotten.

You were so sure that you would stay together for ever. Now, 36 years into the marriage, you find yourself signing divorce papers.

You are bitter and argue all the time. But you’re scared. Scared that if you leave, you’ll be alone forever. Scared that when you go, there will be no one to hold your hand. So you stay. Anything to keep from dying alone.

Friends leave. They move across states. Across oceans. People grow and find themselves shoving you out to make room. You find a note from middle school when going through your junk. It’s signed “BFF” – Best Friends Forever.

What happened to Forever?

Families are often forced to stay together. Even then, with time, with travel, the bonds dissipate. You look at your cousin and wonder where that little girl went to. You see your parents and ask, “When did the glue dissolve? Where did the warm, loving embrace fade to?”

Nothing lasts forever. Relationships come and go like the breeze that cools you during a hot summer’s day, but then is gone, leaving you alone once more.

Some breezes just last longer than others I guess. But, in the end, it moves on.

I suppose we need to hold on to the relationships we have now. Clutch onto them and grip them tight. Because one day, you’ll find them sifting through the cracks of your fingers like sand. You look down, and your hand is empty. Relationships are so fragile. It confuses me. Just be careful with them; they’ll break sooner than you think.